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January 9th, 2017

Do you hear what I hear?
"I said, do you want to go see the ice carvers?"

She didn't respond again. So I moved right in front of her, and repeated, "Do you want to go see the ice carvers this weekend."

Finally she responded, "No, it's too cold. I have a doctor’s appointment this weekend anyway." Then she went back to reading a news article about somebody who tipped too much.

"Ok, you want some coffee?"

No response again. I made a coffee for one and went to work. It's been five years since we were married. I counted one day and got responses to 3 out of 28 questions I asked throughout the day. That's a little over 10%. Now when it happens, I imagine my life could be 90% better with somebody else.

I already decided this had to change. I don't know how I didn't notice when we were dating. But I wouldn't make the same mistake again. I'd tell her when she got back from her doctor’s appointment this weekend.


She's due back in a few minutes now, and my heart is racing. I know this isn't going to be a fun conversation, but I only get one life and I want to be happy. I made a cup of coffee and sat at the table, collecting my thoughts. Do I really want to go through with this?

The door opened and she came in.

"Hey, how was your appointment?"

"No response." Yup, I need to go through with this.

I try again, "I made you a cup of coffee, could you come here? We need to talk." I didn't plan out that phrase, but I see where it comes from now.

No response again.

I get up to go talk to her directly.

"Hi Hun. You'll never guess what happened at the doctor’s office. The doctor said I'm deaf."

I stand, just staring.

"He said he's seen it before. I guess some deaf people get really good at lip reading, so nobody notices."

I'm trying hard to process everything, but only manage to get out a "Huh".

"Oh, that's probably why you always say I don't answer you."

I make sure she's looking at me, "Yeah, that must have been it."