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February 7th, 2017

I was eight years old playing in the forest behind our house in Slovenia when it happened. I was out a little far looking for sticks to build a house when he showed up. Usually I noticed people well before they saw me, but this old man seemed to just appear out of nowhere. He raised his arm, and pointed his finger at me. He chanted, "Ak mate radi niekoho, zomru." In English that's something like, "If you love somebody, they will die". For a few weeks I was scared to go outside in case the old man was there. But time passed and I forgot. A few weeks later I was back outside collecting sticks for a new project.

We moved to a city when I was in high school. Just as I was getting interested in boys, I was now surrounded by them. So it was perhaps inevitable that would fall in love for the first time. The first two weeks were wonderful. We would sneak away from school and walk through the park; hiding behind bushes. On weekends, we would go to the museum. Then one day he just stopped showing up. I went to his home and his parents were crying. They told me he was hit by a car, and had died. I thought of the curse that the old man had said, but I dismissed it.

A few months later I was with Anton. He had already finished school and was working as a writer. Instead of parks and museums we went to fancy restaurants and plays. But this love was also short lived. One night, Anton drank too much as we were at the observation deck of the Neboticnik building. He ran, tripped and fell. Thirteen floors down. This was too much for me. If my love brings death, then I will not love! I tried to go back to school, but the temptations around me were too much. I do not want to kill. So I dropped out, after less than a year of school.

I dedicated myself to work. I thought that love would just not be for me. Instead I would make my mark in the world through what I create. I put my blinders on, and for ten years slowly moved up in my career.

But everything changed one night when I was reading Dostoyevsky's Crime and Punishment. I realized that the curse the old man put on me could be used for good. I could change the world for the better if I fell in love with somebody bad. My love could be a weapon! A few weeks later I had my plan laid out and I was on a plane trip to the United States. It took a few years, but my careful coordination of accidental meetings eventually worked. I met him. I seduced him (well that part was easy). He was in love with me, and I was in love with him.

It's been years since then. We moved in together. We're married. We have a son. I don't spend much time thinking about the curse anymore. Nowadays, my biggest decision is whether to go live in the White house or stay in New York.